The ex-mistress of former presidential candidate John Edwards said she will not participate in DNA testing to establish the paternity of her daughter. Close call for Edwards, who was dreading having to choose which strand of hair to yank out for DNA sampling.

Former "American Idol" runner-up Clay Aiken is a father. The baby has already uttered his first word: “Really?”

A McCain campaign adviser said that Joe Lieberman is being vetted as a potential running mate. Apparently, John McCain is also trying to lose the 2000 election.

In the showcase match-up of the Olympics, the U.S. basketball team swept past hosts China with a final score of 101-70. NBA stars showed their sportsmanship after the game by letting China team members climb up on their shoulders and dunk.

During his seven and a half years in office, President Bush has declared 422 major disasters. Each declaration ended with, “If you think this is bad, wait until you see our response!”