A new study shows that almost all Americans have premarital sex. The study was conducted by The Institute Of Guys Trying To Get Their God-Fearing Girlfriends To Give It Up Already.

In a new position on the war in Iraq, President Bush stated “We're not winning, we're not losing". Words of either a masterful politician or a little league coach in denial.

After announcing Iran’s nuclear capabilities, Ahamdinejad predicted that Britian, Israel and the United States would eventually disappear from the world like the Egyptian Pharaonic kings. Boy, is this year’s Secret Santa at the UN going to be awkward!

Rap megastar Eminem and his high school sweetheart have divorced for a second time. Like most divorces, the ones who get hurt most are the fans that buy his next album, bitterly chronicling the divorce.

A woman going through security at Los Angeles International Airport put her month-old grandson into a plastic bin and slid it into an X-ray machine. The baby was said not to be hurt by the radiation, but was detained for the dirty bomb found in its diaper.