Friday, January 26, 2007

A molecular scientist in North Carolina has developed caffeinated donuts. The scientist boasts they’ll go great with his other invention, fried cigarettes.

New York City plans to give away free condoms with subway maps printed on them. City officials expect the novelty condoms will lower the cases of STDs and drastically change the way New Yorkers give tourists directions.

Record low temperatures have hit New York City on Friday. Just to give you an idea of how cold it really is; the polar ice caps have rented a place in Tribeca.

Today, House speaker Nancy Pelosi made an unannounced visit to Iraq. Pelosi claims she just needed a few days away from all the strife and chaos.

A 10-year-old director is reportedly suing a woman who helped finance his movie for creative control. The young director said he tried to avoid a lawsuit, but threatening to kick her ass after school just wasn’t working.