Sarah Palin said she agreed to accept John McCain's offer to be his running mate after her three daughters voted for her to do it. It’s kind of cute, until you realize that this is how she’ll one day decide whether or not to bomb Iran.
Sarah Palin’s father told reporters that he taught her how to shoot and gut a moose. He then added, “but it was Sarah’s idea to make the moose’s family watch.”
Michelle Obama has landed on People Magazine’s best dressed list. Actually, so did Sarah Palin, but it was for their ‘Best dressed if it were still 1985’ list.
Sarah Palin said Monday that if elected, one of her roles in the McCain administration would involve promoting care for special-needs children. In other words, she’ll be hiring a full-time nanny.
CBS's "60 Minutes" will devote its full broadcast this week to John McCain and Barack Obama. Actually, the show will mostly be about Obama, but for some reason they’re giving McCain the last five minutes to gripe about how irritating he finds personalized ring tones.
The economy has really taken a turn for the worse this week. It’s so bad, today John McCain admitted he doesn’t know how many landscapers he has to lay off.
Tuesday, one of John McCain’s staff members credited the Senator with inventing the BlackBerry. McCain said it actually happened by accident when he was trying to create the first rotary cell phone.
A fund-raising dinner at which Barbra Streisand performed on Tuesday, helped raise 9 million dollars for Barack Obama's campaign. In other news, the Federal Reserve has granted ailing insurance company AIG an emergency Barbra Streisand concert.
According to a new report, Barack Obama's plans to raise taxes on people earning more than 250,000 dollars would cost wealthy New Yorkers almost 16 billion dollars. Boy, he’s just not done sticking it to the Clintons yet, is he?
A researcher has found that social networking sites have become more popular than porn sites. Experts believe this may be due to a growing trend of people preferring to masturbate to someone they know.
Paris Hilton is in mourning today after losing two of her dogs to a vicious coyote attack last night. Poor things. They probably weren’t even full afterwards.
"Lakeview Terrace" debuted at the top spot at the weekend box office. You know it’s a bad weekend for Hollywood when the most exciting film in the theater is named after the home you put your grandmother in.
Bobby Irwin, the 4 year-old son of the late Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin, was seen wrestling a baby crocodile for a potential TV pilot. The pilot’s working title is, “See you soon, Papa”.
Madame Tussaud's returned a wax figure of Adolf Hitler to its Berlin branch after someone beheaded the statue. Should we be worried that Germany has an ample supply of back-up Hitler heads?
Paul McCartney's ex-wife is donating $1 million worth of soy hamburgers, soy hot dogs and soy chicken cutlets to one of the poorest neighborhoods in the Bronx. The gesture actually made one of the poorest neighborhoods in the Bronx feel bad for Paul McCartney.
According to a new book, John Lennon had sexual fantasies about his mother as well Paul McCartney. Even more disturbing- he had sexual fantasies about Yoko Ono.
Kevin Federline skipped one of his sons' birthday parties to extend his stay at a party for a new Las Vegas club. To add insult to injury, it was the new Las Vegas Chucky Cheese Club.
According to a new study, celebrity crushes are healthy and may enhance self-esteem. You know what’s not so healthy? Stalkers with high self-esteem.
"Sex and the City" author Candace Bushnell is set to a series of novels about Carrie Bradshaw's teenage years in high school. Bushnell said readers should expect less “Sex and the City” and more “Dry Humping and the Dugout.”
Moscow is helping Cuba develop its own space center. With Russia’s help, Cuba hopes they’ll soon be able to launch their first raft into outer space.
A dog in France is believed to be the first animal to appear as a witness in a murder inquiry when he "barked furiously" at a potential suspect during a preliminary hearing. Then again, he also barked at the water fountain on the way into the courtroom, so maybe that’s the murderer?
A German shepherd called 911 when his owner was having a seizure. Then the dog called in an order for two large pizzas with extra sausage while waiting for the ambulance to arrive.
Sources say Celine Dion has 11 bodyguards while on stage. They’re not there in case a deranged fan attacks her; they’re there in case her band attacks her.
The Electronics store Best Buy plans to buy Napster for $121 million in cash. After that, Best Buy plans on joining Friendster.
Brad Pitt donated $100,000 to fight a California initiative that would make same-sex marriages illegal. Pitt is either a real friend to the gay community or he wants to make sure that adopting the world’s orphan population isn’t all on him.
Scientists have discovered that eating too many vegetable-only meals can cause your brain to shrink. And if you eat vegetable-only meals while watching the Hills, your brain completely disappears.
They’re now saying there will be two more Spider Man movies, although the plot lines may be running a bit thin. The next one is just Tobey Maguire getting the Spidey suit let out a few inches.
A Florida judge has ruled it unconstitutional to ban the wearing of saggy pants that show your underwear. Hip hop community - 1. Belts- zero.
According to a new study, children whose parents argue a lot are more likely to have problems, both in school and psychologically. I could have told you that- no you couldn’t have!
Doctors are warning David Blaine that when he hangs upside down above Central Park for 60 hours next week he risks going blind. I should have mentioned, he was planning on masturbating the whole time he was hanging upside down.
Pearl Jam front man and Chicago Cubs fan Eddie Vedder released a song for the team called "All the Way." Likewise, long-time New York Mets fan, Billy Joel fans released a song for his team. That song is called, “How can you blow this again?”
No comments:
Post a Comment